After I make the decision in step 3 and say the prayer what is suggested? They tell me although I will feel a sense of peace and direction it will not have any permanent effect unless next or at once it is followed by a personal housecleaning. What do they mean by that? I have to face and be rid of the things in my mind that have been blocking me from God’s power and direction. They suggest no delay in this process. Why? The longer I delay this process the longer I am living with untreated alcoholism.
Step four is a spiritual exercise to inventory my personality. My thinking. I need to see the truth of my thinking.They compare it to a business inventory. A business which does no regular inventory goes broke . Aren’t we broke when we come to AA. I need to see the truth about my anger, fear , and harmful actions that produced shame and guilt. Why? So I can be free of them and will be able to be at peace with myself, God, and other people.
So it is a written list of items. We look at the manifestations of self will that caused me harm. They are resentment, fear, and harmful conduct especially as related to sex relationships.
In my next thought on step 4 I will look at what makes up self will .