Thoughts on Recovery – No. 37 -Step 4 – Resentments – Careful consideration of the first 3 columns

The authors suggest that I carefully consider  the information contained in the first three columns. It is apparent how much anger or resentment I had as a result of a life run on self will. They suggest that the alcoholic only sees how others are wrong. We would only  see how others had wronged us and justify our feelings. We blamed others. When I did the resentment inventory  this became so clear to me.

A life of deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. It was true for me is it true for you? I  permitted them . I gave safe harbor to them. I can see how I squandered so much time and energy in resentment. The authors emphasize how the business of resentment is infinitely grave. It is fatal. Why? When I am angry I am blocking God . I have no access to his direction and power. I have shut myself off from the power of the spirit. I have no power not to drink or live successfully. A life of resentments makes my life sober miserable. The insanity of alcohol will return. Therefore I have to find a different way to live. I can’t continue to live a life of anger and resentment! Do you agree?

A famous quote in AA is resentment is me taking poison hoping you will die.I have learned in recovery my anger is never justified. It is always wrong. It is wrong Judgement . I would give whoever I was angry at power over me. I don’t want to do that anymore. Many of my perceived wrongs were not even real. I had distorted thinking. I saw things wrong.  I have to be able to master my anger. I don’t have the power but the book gives me directions on how to have my anger removed by God.

In the next thought on recovery I will review these instructions.